Smiles from the Bible

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married Ruth?
A. Ruthless.

Q. What do they call pastors in Germany ?
A. German Shepherds.

Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh’s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a
Little prophet.

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David’s Triumph
Was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles
Were all in one Accord.

Q.. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.

Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in in Eden ?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses.. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jor dan . The banks were always overflowing.

Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.

Q. Why didn’t they play cards on the Ark ?
A. Because Noah was standing on the deck. ( Groan.)

PS… Did you know it’s a sin for a woman to make coffee?
Yup, it’s in the Bible. It says . . ‘He-brews’

KEEP SMILING!!!! GOD LOVES YOU BUNCHES AND BUNCHES!!!!
Friends are God’s way of taking care of us.

…Faith, Hope & Love — but the greatest of these is LOVE.

How to properly place new employees

1. Put 400 bricks in a closed room.

2. Put your new employees in the room and close the door.

3. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours.

4. Then analyze the situation:

a. If they are counting the bricks, put them in the Accounting Department.

b. If they are recounting them, put them in Auditing.

c. If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks, put them in Engineering.

d. If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order, put them in Planning.

e. If they are throwing the bricks at each other, put them in Operations.

f. If they are sleeping, put them in Security.

g. If they have broken the bricks into pieces, put them in Information Technology.

h. If they are sitting idle, put them in Human Resources.

i. If they say they have tried different combinations, they are looking for more, yet not a brick has been moved, put them in Sales.

j. If they have already left for the day, put them in Marketing.

k. If they are staring out of the window, put them in Strategic Planning.

l. If they are talking to each other, and not a single brick has been moved, congratulate them and put them in Top Management ………

Finally, if they have surrounded themselves with bricks in such a way that they can neither be seen nor heard from, put them in Government.

PhotoFunia

Ek het gister by Boebelaberry gehoor van PhotoFunia.  Dit is baie pret en mens vergeet van alles en almal om jou…

Gebed vir besige mense

Here, ons het ‘n moeë generasie geword!
Ons is moeg gewerk, moeg vir probleme,
Moeg vir mense. Ons het veral moeg geword
Om alles altyd reg te doen.
Om aanvaarbaar te wees, móét ons
Suksesvol, begaafd en finansieel sterk wees
Met duidelike doelwitte.
Verder moet ons goeie ouers, lojale vriende,
Toegewyde familiemense
En betrokke gemeenskapwerkers wees
Sjoe, dis ‘n oorvol mondvol!
Vandag wil ek sommer net by U kom rus
En vra dat U my die regte prioriteite sal wys.
Sal U my help onderskei tussen die dinge
Wat regtig saak maak en die
Dinge wat die wêreld ons probeer voorskryf?
Ja, help my om te weet wat vir U belangrik is.
Maak huis skoon met my, Here.
Verwyder die selfopgelegde eise
In my oorvol lewe
En leer my om sommer net U kind te wees.

In U naam vra ek dit,

Amen

My gesin

Vrydagmiddag was my hart so seer toe ek my laaitie se skoolboeke teken. Ek het hierdie opstel in een van sy boeke ontdek:

Wat meer kan ek sê…